Click HERE to view Rev. Sue Frederick’s guided meditation during the service.
SONG LYRICS
I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I’m not enough
Every single lie that tells me I will never measure up
Am I more than just the sum of every high and every low
Remind me once again just who I am because I need to know
Ooh-oh
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And you say I am held when I am falling short
And when I don’t belong, oh You say I am Yours
And I believe
Oh, I believe
What You say of me
I believe
The only thing that matters now is everything You think of me
In You I find my worth, in You I find my identity
Ooh-oh
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And you say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh You say I am Yours
And I believe
Oh, I believe
What You say of me
Oh, I believe
Taking all I have, and now I’m laying it at Your feet
You have every failure, God, You have every victory
Ooh-oh
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh You say I am Yours
And I believe
Oh, I believe
What You say of me
I believe
Oh, I believe
Yes, I believe
What You say of me
I believe
MESSAGE
So a cell phone rings in a men’s locker room. And a gentleman opens the phone and says, “Hello,” and then places it on speaker.
And the conversation begins, “Hi, honey! It’s me! Are you at the club?”
“Yes.”
“I’m at the mall, and there’s this really beautiful leather coat, and it only costs $2,000. Can I have it?”
“Sure!”
“Oh, and I stopped by the Lexus dealership, and they have the one I really like. Can I have it?”
And he says, “Well, how much is it?”
She says, “$90,000.”
“Well, if we’re going to pay that much, we need all the features with it.”
“Of course! Oh, and one more thing. I finished talking to Sara, and the house I wanted is back on the market again, and they’re asking $980,000 for it.”
“Well, offer $900,000 and then if they don’t take that, offer the other $80,000 if you really, really want it.”
And she says, “Oh, honey; you are the best! I love you so much! Bye!”
And he says, “I love you, too! Bye.” And he hangs up the phone. And then all the men are staring at him in the locker room. And he calmly looks around and says, “Anyone know whose phone this is?” [Congregation laughs] Alright …[Laughs]
So how many people have ever had a time in your life where you felt like you weren’t enough? Or you didn’t measure up? Or you didn’t have what it takes? Anybody have that experience?
I’ll bet every single of us has had times in our lives where we don’t feel like we’re enough. That we’re not smart enough; we’re not successful enough; we’re not tall enough; we’re not good looking enough. We’re not rich enough; we’re not thin enough; we’re not outgoing enough; not spiritual enough. And sometimes it’s not just that we feel that we aren’t enough, we feel like we don’t have enough. We don’t have enough love; we don’t have enough money; we don’t have enough freedom; we don’t have enough joy or good fortune.
So when we are in that place where we feel down — where we feel inadequate; where we feel like we aren’t good enough — what is it that lifts up? What is it that can help us rise up again? And what is it that can help us feel good? And I will tell you in a word, it is to BELIEVE. There is incredible power in believing. That when we believe, it lifts us. And it ignites the strength of will and resilience in us to open up to new possibilities and create something greater and better in our lives. BELIEVING.
`There’s a book called The Magic of Believing, and it says that, when we believe, we actually raise our vibrational level. That when we believe, it actually awakens and opens a way of greater attracting more good in our lives. So when we are down; when we are struggling; when we feel powerless or hopeless, the best thing we can do is to believe. Amazing things happen when we believe.
This is Week #1 of the fall version of the “Songs of Life” series, where I take a song that’s kind of popular and extract from it a spiritual message and idea. And a message of how to live our lives in greater and better ways.
I’ll bet every one of us has some song that got us through a difficult time; some song that inspired us to keep going; a song that helped us fulfill our dreams; or reminded us who we really are; or brought comfort and peace to ourselves.
Today we’re going to look at the 2018 song by Lauren Daigle entitled, “You Say,” that we just heard. And for me, the over arcing thing — besides the fact that it’s touching and uplifting and reassuring — I think the message of this song is the importance of believing in yourself.
You know, the song is in the context: She’s having a hard time. She’s down; she doesn’t feel good enough. She doesn’t feel like she’s measuring up. She doesn’t feel loved. And she’s looking for the reassurance — some affirmation, some support, some encouragement to help her believe in herself.
The opening lines say:
I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I’m not enough
Every single lie that tells me I will never measure up
Am I more than just the sum of every high and every low
Remind me once again just who I am because I just need to know
And she gets the reassurance she’s seeking from God in the chorus. It says:
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And you say I am held when I am falling apart
And when I don’t belong, oh You say I am Yours
And I believe
Oh, I believe
What You say of me
I believe
I will tell you, one of the most important things for us to have a happy and joyous and meaningful life is to believe in ourselves. Now think about the level that you believe in yourself right now, and I bet every one of us could probably increase that level of belief in ourselves.
So this morning, what I want to do: I want to give you seven practices — seven important principles — that we need to engage in to fully believe in ourselves.
The first one is to BELIEVE IN GOD. You know, the Bible has 289 — I counted! [congregants laugh] — 289 references to believing. That’s how powerful believing is! Here’s some of my favorite ones:
“All things are possible to those who believe.”
“Whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.”
“Let not your hearts be troubled; believe in God. Believe also in me.”
And my favorite:
“He who believes in me shall do the works that I do, and even greater works than these.”
These all show how powerful believing is.
You know, when Jesus said, “He who believes in me shall do the works … and even greater things,” what he’s saying is: “If you believe in the Spirit of God in you the way I have believed in the Spirit of God in me, through that Spirit you shall do even greater things than I.”
In the Book of Hebrews it says, “Anyone who comes to God must believe God is.” Anyone who comes to God must believe God is. And they don’t really finish that sentence … so I will! [Congregation laughs] Must believe that God is present and alive, available and accessible within us, right here and now. That when we come to God, to believe that God is fully available, accessible and available to each and every one of us.
And the other aspect is to believe that God is our strength when we feel weakness. That God is our healing when we feel sick. That God is our peace when we feel turmoil. That God is clarity when we feel confusion. That God is love when we feel alone. That God is abundance when we feel lack. That God is joy when we feel sadness.
And the question is: Do you believe that God is there, fully available? And God is all of what you could ever seek, need or desire?
You know, Jesus absolutely unshakably believed in the presence and power of God. But he built that belief. He built that belief by consistently, regularly and dedicatingly turning himself to God in prayer at least five times a day. Sometimes we have to build our belief. He sought God first; he trusted God in all things; he gave thanks to God; he delighted himself in God. And he showed that the more we immerse and align our minds in the Mind of God, the more our belief in God grows and expands.
It is about believing in God. That is the first foundation to believe in ourselves.
And the second thing is to REMIND OURSELVES OF OUR DIVINE NATURE. You know, even though we’re told in the Bible some amazing things about ourselves … like you are created in the image and likeness of God! That’s pretty powerful! When you consider that God is the Energy and the Love and the Intelligence that made everything in the universe! That we are created in the image and likeness of that Spirit and that Intelligence and Power. And if God is love, that means we are created in the image and likeness of love. And if God is peace, we’re created in the image and likeness of peace. If God is joy, we’re created in the image and likeness of joy. If God is abundance, we are created in the image and likeness of abundance.
We’re also told that God loves us; God blesses us abundantly. That God heals us, restores us and renews us. We’re told it is the Father’s good pleasure to give us the kingdom. But do you believe it? They’re pretty extraordinary and amazing things, don’t you think? But the question is: Do you believe?
I would say we all would say that we believe in God. But I bet every single one of us probably has a harder time believing in ourselves. How many people ever had a hard time believing in yourself? I mean, it is amazing! We have a hard time!
And why is that? I think there are two reasons. The first one is: I think that we’re conditioned that we aren’t that good. We’re not lovable; we’re not worthy. We have all kinds of negative messages. And the second one is: I think we develop some level of spiritual amnesia. We forget the presence and power of God. We forget that that light of God is in us.
We’re told that we are the temple of the Living God. We’re the light of the world. We forget that Spirit and presence is within us. It’s like we abandon our spiritual nature, and we head to fear and lack. And we believe that it won’t work out; we believe that things and life will not get any better.
Two of my favorite stories that illustrate the importance of remembering your spiritual nature — remembering that presence and power of God within — is The Lion King and the story of the Prodigal Son. They’re both almost parallel!
And what happens: one takes his money, squanders it, and he’s eating with the pigs, and really struggling. Doesn’t feel good enough. And the other one thinks he killed his dad, and he runs away from being the king of the pride.
And then both, the two lines that changed them, was remembering and believing. “Remember who you are” for Simba. Remember your divine heritage; you are royalty! You are meant to be the king! And it is when he remembered and believed the truth about himself, he was able to rise and go be the great leader he was meant to be.
And the Prodigal Son. It says, “And then he came to himself.” He’s eating with the pigs, and then he came to himself! He realized, “I am more than this.” And then he was able to get up and rise and go back to his father and rejoice and live a great life.
The truth is: Every one of us — you need to remember who you are! You are God’s beloved child! You’re an amazing spiritual being! You’re the temple of the Living God! You’re the light of the world! This is powerful stuff! We need to remember. But we need to absolutely believe that, as well.
“I am a beautiful, powerful, amazing child of God.”
Together: [with congregation] “I am a beautiful, powerful, amazing child of God.”
“I am a wonderful, capable, talented child of God.”
[With congregation]: “I am a wonderful, capable, talented child of God.”
“I am a lovable, joyful, understanding child of God.”
Together: [with congregation] “I am a lovable, joyful, understanding child of God.”
But here’s the thing about this. Is that we believe, but we always have to work on our belief. Every one of us says, “Yeah, we believe in God,” but do we always believe in God? We’ll say, “Oh, yeah, I believe in myself,” but there are times we know we don’t believe in ourselves.
Here’s one of the most powerful lines that I think really captures that experience. And it’s in Mark 9, Verse 4. It says, “Lord, I believe, but please help my unbelief.” [Congregation laughs] Don’t we all have that? That we believe: we want to believe; we desire to believe. But we don’t always believe. And that’s what the message is: that we need to keep practicing our belief. Keep remembering who you are. Keep reminding yourself: you’re the light of the world! That God’s Spirit dwells in you! You have been created in the image and likeness of the Divine that created all things! It is in you!
And to believe in ourselves, we need to remember our divine nature, our spiritual nature.
The third thing is to LOVE OURSELVES. You know, it says to love others as we love ourselves. Somehow we have this thing where we think loving ourselves is something bad or egotistical or narcissistic about it. And not only sometimes do we have a hard time loving ourselves, heck! We have a hard time sometimes liking ourselves!
Sometimes we can be brutal on ourselves when we mess up or make a mistake. It is amazing how we can put ourselves down. It is amazing how we harshly judge our appearances; our body; our look. Sometimes we judge the mistakes we’ve made, or the choices that we have made. Sometimes we get upset at ourselves because we’re not disciplined enough and didn’t stay on our diet. We have all kinds of ways where the first thing we want to do is pounce on ourselves. First thing we want to do is criticize and put ourselves down. Sometimes we hate ourselves; reject ourselves; and undermine and sabotage our own success.
Do you know that the greatest thing you could do for your family; the greatest thing you could do for yourself; the greatest thing you could do for your work is to love yourself? To be more kind. To be more gentle. To be more encouraging. To be more supportive. To be more forgiving. To be more understanding. To love yourself more actually opens yourself as a channel to be more loving and kind and joyful and considerate to other people.
I know you’re good to others; the question is: How good are you to yourself? I know you compliment others; the question is: How often do you compliment yourself? I know you acknowledge people’s talents and their gifts; the question is: How often do you acknowledge your own talents and your own gifts?
The most important relationship we have in our lives is with ourselves. And the extent to a relationship with ourselves is the extent to our relationship with others, but also our ability to attract and enjoy the different blessings and gifts of life, and to do the work we came to do. We can’t do our work fully when we can’t stand ourselves, or when we put ourselves and criticize ourselves.
But to be more accepting, more loving, more joyful; it’s an important thing.
And that leads us to the next thing, which is to ACCEPT OURSELVES. How many people have at least one area in your life — one situation — you would like to give back to the universe? [Congregation laughs] Anybody want to trade something in? You know, switch it out? I mean, I’ll bet every one of us has something in our lives.
But here’s the deal: whatever is in your life is meant for your highest good. It’s for the expansion of our souls.
I’ll bet every one of us has something in your life that you resist; you hate; you dislike; or you compare yourself to. That we absolutely wish was different. That we’re having a hard time accepting. “This isn’t right! I didn’t belong in this family!” [Congregation laughs] Or, “This situation is wrong! That’s not mine! That’s not what I wanted! That’s not the life I wanted to live!”
You know, part of believing in yourself is to accept yourself and accept your life and your situation. You’re in the right family; all the things that are in your life — even the ones that are pressing your button — is there for the unfoldment of your soul!
And so the fighting and the resistance … You can’t believe in yourself if you’re hating aspects of your life and resisting certain things that are going on.
You remember when Peter said, “Why has this man been born blind? Is it something he did? Or his parents did wrong?” And Jesus said, “No; this is done so the glory of God could be manifested in your life.”
The fact is: some of us struggle with our bodies. Some struggle with addiction. Some struggle with help or finances. Some people have the experience of losing a child or going through divorce. There are all kinds of tough things we all go through. And hating them and rejecting them and wishing them away is not going to help. It is to face them with God and gain whatever lessons and blessings that we are meant to gain from them.
Every person is here to learn something. Every person is here to heal something. Everyone is here to overcome. And there are also gifts we’re meant to share. There’s a difference that we’re here to make. There are things that we are here to contribute that no one else can contribute. And the truth is: we need to find a place of acceptance and make peace and acceptance with our family and all our situations. And it is from that healthy place we can live it and gain all the things we are meant to gain. And enjoy all that we are meant to enjoy.
Number five is to FOCUS ON THE GOOD. If we want to believe in ourselves, we need to focus more on the good. The Book of Philemon says, “Our faith becomes more effective when we acknowledge everything good.”
We know that we can focus on everything not so good about us: what’s wrong with us. But how often are you acknowledging how good you are? How talented you are? How beautiful you are? How smart you are? How organized you are?
There are all kinds of things we are good at! You know, you might have a great business sense. Or you’re really good at inter-relationships. Great personality. Maybe you’re a great leader. Or you’re great with animals. We need to acknowledge all the things we’re good at! You know; you’re a great cook. Or great at being creative. Or great at parallel parking. [Congregation laughs]
It doesn’t matter what it is! The question is: How often are you acknowledging it to you? How often are you patting yourself on the back and appreciating the talent you are?
This song is called, “You Say.” And guess what? What you say matters! What you say about you! To say, “I’m a loser” or “I always mess up with this or make bad choices or do this or that” … That is not honoring or believing in ourselves!
In the Book of Deuteronomy it says, “Let the weak say I am strong.” So to focus on the good that we are; it’s important to speak it; to affirm it; acknowledge it. And then sometimes speak the good that you want to be. Speak the good you want to grow. That will get us much further than criticizing or putting ourselves down. Focus on the good! Focus on the good that you are and the good that you want to be.
And then number six is to LEARN FROM OUR MISTAKES. Everybody messes up! Everyone makes mistakes; a huge part of life is learning. A huge part of life! It says, “Jesus grew in wisdom and stature.” Because he learned; he learned; he learned! We constantly need to learn in life and ask, “What is life trying to teach me right now?”
Do you know they did studies — the Association of Psychological Science did studies — on the efficacy of learning from our mistakes. And they had two groups; I don’t know how they figured it out. But groups who believed in themselves — were very confident — and those who were insecure and not as confident, feeling unworthy. And what they found was: in the brainwaves about a mistake, the ones who had more confidence and belief in themselves were able to access different brain circuitry that gave them better perspective, and actually helped them learn from their mistakes more effectively. The individuals who didn’t believe in themselves weren’t able to access those things and weren’t able to learn as effectively from their mistakes.
To believe in oneself helps us learn and become more resilient and more likely to overcome, and actually get the best out of a situation. The more we believe in ourselves, the more we can extract from the mistakes and errors and challenges of our lives.
I’ll tell you: when it comes down to it, I think one of the most important things about living a great life is to feel good about yourself! We may not be perfect, but to feel good about ourselves. Yeah, we have some hard days here and there, but overall how good do you feel about you? I mean, you get to be you! The bonus is: nobody else is you! You are the only you in the entire world! We should feel pretty good about that!
And the better you feel about you, the more you enjoy your life; the more you achieve; the more you learn; the more you love. It is an amazing and powerful thing! Be yourself! Be you! Everybody else is already taken; you may as well be the best “you” you can be! [Congregation laughs] And a huge part of believing in ourselves is to learn from our mistakes. To learn: What is life trying to teach me? What is this situation trying to teach me?
And the final thing is to BELIEVE IN YOUR DREAMS. Everybody know the story with Ezekiel and the Valley of Dry Bones? So Ezekiel is there in the Valley of Dry Bones, and he and God are there. And God says to Ezekiel, “Hey, do you believe that these dead bones can come back to life?”
And he’s kind of acknowledging. And God says, “Well, if you do, then prophesy! Speak to those dead bones and prophesy they will come back to life.”
And so he started speaking life into the bones, and the bones started moving and then skin starts coming on them.
See, bones in the Bible represent our dreams. And so a dry bones represents a dream that you have that you thought has died and shriveled up and will never come back. And so what this is trying to say is that you can speak life if you believe that it can come back to life.
So do you believe that you can have a happy life? Do you believe that you can have a more prosperous life? Or loving life? Or fulfilling or meaningful life? Do you believe whatever challenge you’re facing in life that you can overcome? And life will get better, even if you can’t see it right now? Do you believe? Do you believe that you have it within you? Do you believe that it is God’s calling for you to live a more prosperous life?
Again, Jesus said, “Whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.”
So the other day I got back to my house, and I kind of turned the temperature up. It was 86 in the house, so I went to the thermostat, and I turned it down to 72. [Congregation laughs] It was still 86 in the house, but the thermostat was 72. And I knew that, in time, the outside temperature was going to equal the thermostat temperature.
And that’s how it is in life! That no matter what the outside temperature of your life is, what’s the thermostat setting you want to set and believe in? Because if you set that thermostat temperature and believe in it, everything will work: that the outer will begin to match the inner.
So if you had to reset your thermometer of your life, what would you believe it to be? Would it be more joyful? Would it include more love or more free time? What is it that you want? And are you willing to set that thermostat and believe? Set a new vision? Set a new intention and believe?
A remarkable individual that I’ve read some stuff about is Thomas Edison. Of course, we know the classic with the electric light bulb: “I didn’t fail 10,000 times; I just discovered 10,000 ways that did not work.” But he’s even more amazing. So he was home schooled; his mom taught him arithmetic and writing and reading and everything. And she instilled in him the belief that you can get better. That more is possible; you can make a difference.
And so you see that in all areas of his life. So with the 10,000 things … he kept going because he believed. He believed that he could discover light, and make it more simple and inexpensive and he could change people’s lives. That’s what kept him going: it was his belief! He believed in himself; he believed in possibilities; and he believed that he could make a difference!
Do you know that he had 1,093 patents? This bad boy invented everything! He believed everything was possible! He actually said, “If you did everything you are capable of, you would astound yourself!” And you know what it all starts with? Believing. Do you believe? His patents included — besides the light bulb — the phonograph and the camera for motion pictures.
The question is: Do you believe in you? Do you believe in the possibilities? And do you believe that you can make a difference?
The fact is: every one of us gets down sometimes. Every one of us has a tough time. We don’t feel like we measure up. And the key to rising up again is to believe: to believe in God; to believe in ourselves; to believe in loving and accepting and learning. And believing that we can do great things; that we can have dreams; that we can fulfill our lives in great ways.
If you want a better life — you want a more fulfilling life — the key is to believe in yourself. Because believing in yourself is a game-changer; it is a life-changer; and it can really happen for you … if you believe. And that’s the message from the song, “You Say.”
God bless you!
[Congregation applauds]
Copyright 2022 Unity of Phoenix Spiritual Center/Rev. Richard Maraj