The Lessons of Mary and Joseph

December 18, 2022

Series: Sunday Worship

Click HERE to view Rev. Jimmie Scott’s guided meditation during the service.

So this morning I told two jokes at the start of the service, and neither of them worked. [Congregation laughs] But I’m feeling optimistic that it might this time! So here we go!

How did Mary and Joseph know how much baby Jesus weighed at birth? They had a “weigh” in the manger! [Congregation groans and laughs] Okay.

Exhausted and worn out, Joseph asked for a room, and the innkeeper shook his head and said, “No! We’re full.”  Joseph pleaded, “Please; my wife is pregnant!” The innkeeper fires back, “Hey, that’s not my fault!” And Joseph said, “It’s not my fault, either!” [Congregation and Rev. Maraj laugh] Okay. Not bad. Alright. Woo!

So today we’re talking about Mary and Joseph. And so they’re the two main characters in the Christmas story up until Jesus is born. And they did all the things that were necessary for the birth of the Christ child to happen. The birth of the Christ child is the focus and the reason for the season, but I would say that the role that Mary and Joseph played is hugely valuable and often overlooked.

Mary was a virgin; she was probably between 12 and 15 years old. Joseph was a simple man; a carpenter. And he may have been in his 30s; he may have been in his 40s. And they were chosen to be the parents of the Savior! To be the mom and dad for baby Jesus.

And so could you imagine what that experience was like for them? How amazing? How surreal? And maybe even a bit overwhelming?

And they had a lot of work to do! One of the things is, because of the census, they had to go from Nazareth to Bethlehem. That was a 90-mile trek on foot and donkey! And then they reach there, exhausted; no room at the inn. And they have to go to a cave with no help. And that’s where they gave birth to the baby Jesus.

The work that they did, to me, was not just physical work of doing these things; I think there was emotional and spiritual work that they did that helped bring forth. I think they are incredible examples for us; there is much in the qualities they demonstrated to teach us about how to fulfill our role and help bring forth something greater through ourselves and into our world.

I’m going to talk about some different qualities, but I’ll tell you: both of them demonstrated an underlying single quality that made all of this possible. And that quality was: THEY WERE WILLING.  It was the willingness of this young virgin and this older carpenter that allowed them to become vehicles through which the birth of the Christ child happened. That the Christ light — the light of God — was born and came into this world.

Willingness doesn’t sound like a big deal, but I tell you: it is a huge deal. Because it is a prerequisite for growth; for transformation; for happiness and success; and doing greater things.

Let me ask you a question: How willing would you say you are in general? On a scale of one to 10 — 10 being the highest — how willing of a person are you? Like, how willing are you to learn? How willing are you to change? How willing are you to change your perspective in life? How willing are you to let go and move on? How willing are you to forgive? How willing are you to be more honest with yourself? Or with a person and people in your life? How willing are you to be more compassionate and more understanding? How willing are you to be more daring and go beyond what you think your limits are?

Willingness is a powerful thing that opens the doors to amazing and wonderful possibilities and creativity and opportunities. And to show how important it is: Have you ever been unwilling? Have you ever been closed off? Resistant? Reluctant? Rigid? Inflexible? Cynical?

There’s something powerful in the lessons of Mary and Joseph, and they all have to do with willingness. And so today we’re going to look at five lessons of willingness that Mary and Joseph demonstrated that brought forth the birth of the Christ child. That brought forth something amazing in and through them and in and to our world.

And so we’re going to look at Mary first. So let me just read from Luke 1: 26-38. Here’s what it says:

In the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a town in Galilee called Nazareth, to a virgin engaged to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. The virgin’s name was Mary. And he came to her and said, “Greetings, favored one! The Lord is with you.”

But she was perplexed by his words and pondered what sort of greeting this might be.

The angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God. And you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you will name him Jesus. He will be great and will be called Son of the Most High, and the Lord will give to him the throne of his ancestor of David. He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and of his kingdom there will be no end.”

Mary said to the angel, “How could this be, since I am a virgin?” The angel said to her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; therefore, the child to be born will be holy; he will be called Son of God. And now your relative Elizabeth, in her old age, has also conceived a song, and this is the six month for her who was said to be barren. For nothing will be impossible with God.”

And then Mary said, “Here I am, the servant of the Lord; let it be done according to your word.”

And so here are the things that I think that Mary taught us.

The first one is she was WILLING TO LISTEN. She was willing to listen to the angel of God, even though what was being said seemed so big and so impossible; so beyond her comprehension. She was willing to listen to the Spirit and the voice of God speaking through her.

So how good of a listener are you? How many people would say you could probably do a little better job of listening overall in your life? Okay; about six of us. Good! [Congregation laughs] I mean, I would say if we’re really honest, of all the communications skills, that the weakest one we have and the one we that could use the most improvement is to listen. Sometimes we’re not very good at listening to ourselves; listening to others; and especially and often not listening to God.

You ever gotten some guidance from God to make a shift in your life or to move in a different direction or open a space for something? And you ignored it and you didn’t follow it? Anybody ever not follow that inner voice? I think sometimes we don’t like to listen, particularly when something is scary or different or makes us feel uncomfortable or challenges us, or is beyond our current level of understanding.

I think Mary demonstrates so powerfully how important it is, if you want to achieve something greater, you’ve got to listen. You’ve got to tune in to that inner voice. I believe just listening will improve our level of awareness and clarity and understanding. Listening opens a way for inspiration and guidance and knowing what is for the highest and the best. And for us to be able and willing to listen, we’ve got to be willing to be still; to be silent; to be quiet. And to create a space to allow that voice of God to speak to us. That voice is always speaking; always seeking to guide us and show us the highest and best way. The question is that we aren’t always listening.

And so listening, I would say, is the first thing that Mary teaches us. If you absolutely want to do something greater to improve the quality of your life, take time to listen. Listen to yourself. Listen to others. Listen to that voice of God. Because great things will come forth from it.

The second thing she did: She was WILLING TO BELIEVE. I mean, here she was: she was a virgin thinking, “There’s no way I can be having a baby,” but she absolutely was willing to believe. Even though she didn’t know how; even though it was beyond her comprehension, she believed.

So often in our lives, when something big or huge comes into our lives, we think we don’t have what it takes. I don’t have enough money; I don’t have enough education; I don’t have enough time. We always think … And then we start doubting ourselves. We doubt that we’re capable; we doubt that it is possible.

And the thing about it is: All things are possible to those who believe. This thing about believing; it is such a powerful thing. It says, “Whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it.” Somebody once said that what the mind can conceive and believe it will achieve. This power of belief creates almost a magnetic energy that attracts forth the things that we need to manifest and create the things that we want in our lives.

I love that Mary, even though she didn’t feel was qualified, was willing to believe that God had a plan for her; believing that this was her purpose; and believing that somehow it would absolutely happen.

And so my question for you is: Think of something in your life right now that you’d like. And do you believe that it will happen? And are you willing to infuse that belief in the same way that Mary did? To believe that this thing is possible? To believe that you are absolutely worthy of it? And to believe that it will work out? That good things will absolutely come from it?

She was willing to listen. She was willing to believe. And she was always WILLING TO GO TO HER HEART TO CONNECT WITH HER FEELING NATURE. In several different versions, it says, “Mary pondered these things in her heart.” She pondered, which is to think deeply. To think carefully. And it says, “in her heart.” She took her thinking nature and feeling nature and made that connection.

And it says, “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.” That it’s so important for us to align our mind — our head — with our heart and our thinking with our feeling. Even though Mary was willing to listen; even though she was willing to believe; I love that she was willing to always go to her heart and to check in, and to center herself and connect herself in that place to bring forth the best from herself.

Anybody ever had something that looked like it was right, but it didn’t feel right? Or that it didn’t look so good, but it felt right? Sometimes you have to check in with your feelings. Does it feel like it’s the right thing? Does it feel like this is for you? Does it feel like this is the best and most important thing to do?

You know, when I was in the process of becoming a minister — or thinking about it — my head would always talk myself out of it. Like, “That doesn’t sound like me; a minister? I don’t think I’d be good at that! You’ve got to work on weekends and holidays!” [Congregation laughs] “That doesn’t sound like a good gig! Got to do funerals; this does not sound good!”

Yet, the few times I had to speak in a church before — well before I became a minister — it always felt right. When I went to Unity Village for the first time to take some classes, I felt at home. When I was in seminary, I just felt such a joy. In fact, I only started doing church part-time; that was how reluctant I was! But it kept feeling so right that it ended up growing into full-time. And I absolutely love and adore it. Sometimes we need to say, “Does this feel right for me?” And to take time to connect with our heart.

William Shakespeare, in Measure for Measure, has a line that says, “Go to thy bosom, knock there, and ask the heart what it doth know.” Our heart knows! There are times where you absolutely know in your heart it is right for you or it is wrong for you. And Mary kept going back to that. She kept going back to her heart. Regardless of all the things being said, she checked back in with herself. And I love that she did that.

Mary came across to me as someone who was always calm and centered. And why? Because she always checked in with her feeling nature. She pondered these things in her heart.

And our invitation and lesson from here is: Whatever you’ve got going on — whether it’s about making a change in your job or dating somebody — check in with your heart. “Is this the right thing for me?” Whether it’s buying a new house or making some decisions, just keep checking in with your heart: into your feeling nature. Because it will bring a level of clarity.

If we want to be more centered — more heart-centered like Mary — in all of our decisions, we need to take time to connect with our feeling nature. Thinking is good, and feeling is good … but together they are a huge and important benefit and a great lesson for all of us.

Now let’s look at Joseph. And I’ll tell you, Joseph just did not get much recognition. He didn’t get much acknowledgement or praise. In the Nativity scene, he didn’t get the top billing. Mary and Jesus were the stars! They were the big names on the marquee, and in small print, “Joseph and the animals.” [Congregation laughs] That’s how it was!

He is really, in my opinion, an unsung hero. Let me read you the passage about Joseph and then we’ll talk about the lessons in willingness that he demonstrated. It says in Matthew 1, beginning with Verse 18:

Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph, her husband, was faith to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.

After he had considered this, an angel of the Lord came to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home a your wife, because what is conceived in her is of the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you will call him Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.”

All of this took place to fulfill what the Lord has said through the prophet: “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel, which means ‘God with us.'”

When Joseph woke up, he did as the angel commanded and took Mary home as his wife.

So Joseph was engaged to Mary, who was found to be pregnant. Could you imagine what that felt like for him? Being engaged to someone and to find out she’s pregnant, and it’s not yours? Could you imagine what he felt? Maybe a little embarrassed; maybe a little betrayed; maybe humiliated; maybe disillusioned; maybe even angry or hurt. His ego had definitely been bruised. To find out it’s not your kid of the woman you want to marry. Even if you find out it’s God’s kid, it’s still not an easy thing from a feeling nature!

But here’s the thing about Joseph: he was such an honorable man and a man of such high character. Because by the law, he could have divorced her for this reason. That would have been absolutely legal. But he didn’t want to embarrass her. He would have wanted to do it quietly; that was his initial reaction, which is still very honorable.

When the angel of the Lord came and said, “No; this is the thing to do; this is the right thing to do,” he absolutely followed it. HE DIDN’T LET HIS EGO OR EMBARRASSMENT OF LOOKING LESS MANLY – OR WHATEVER IMAGE – STOP HIM FROM DOING WHAT WAS RIGHT; or stop him from doing what was best; stop him from doing from what he was called to do and the way that he was supposed to contribute to this story.

I love that Joseph did not feel embarrassed after or felt emasculated. He proudly did what was the work he came to do. And he chose to honor his promise and honor Mary and to be a great support. Instead, what he did: he focused on God; he focused on Mary; he focused on Jesus; and doing what was the best.

In my opinion, Joseph demonstrated a high level of spiritual maturity and spiritual mastery. To let go of what your ego and image is — and all your attachments — to do what was for the highest and best and the greatest good for all was an amazing demonstration. And it was the right thing! I’m sure it was not necessarily the easiest thing, but he did that. And I think I was a valuable and huge thing that he did. He let go of his ego to do what was right and what was for the best.

We all have different stations in life. It takes all kinds of talents and perspectives and abilities to make our lives as great and wonderful. In Corinthians it says that the body is made up of all different parts. And it is all those different parts that make the body as amazing as it is. And it even says in there: the nose is important, but if every part of us was just nose, it wouldn’t be as much fun. If every part of us was just an ear, it wouldn’t be as great. If every part of our bodies were just knees, it wouldn’t. But it’s because of all the different talents, abilities, shapes, sizes and gifts that makes our lives so great.

And so what I’m trying to say with this is: Joseph accepted what was his role. What was his part. He wasn’t attached to recognition or power or intention. But he took what was his to do. Sometimes we resist and have a hard time because of our ego doing certain things or moving in a certain direction. Letting go of this or that. And I think Joseph really shows how important it is to let go of your ego and choose from a level of spiritual mastery to do what is yours and the most honorable and positive way to be of service for the best of everyone.

Everybody always wants to be the star! Everybody wants to be Michael Jordan. But the thing is: to have the championship, he needed Scottie Pippin and Phil Jackson and Toni Kukoč and John Paxson … I mean, he really needed Bill Wennington and Luke Longley … all these people. And you all are saying, “Who are they?” That’s right! [Congregation laughs] It’s all of them were needed! We always here about Jordan, but it was the entire team of everyone doing their role and their part.

And I think we all have to come to terms and make peace that, “This is who I am.” Not comparing it to anybody else. “These are the gifts that I’m here to share.” And, to me, that is something I think is very cool. And the humility of Joseph I find very, very inspiring.

The second thing that he did is: He loved big! HE LOVED AND SUPPORTED BIG! He loved Mary and supported her bigtime. He loved Jesus and supported him bigtime. Raised him like his own child. They had four other kids, and he just kept loving big as a husband and loving big as a father.

And sometimes there are situations in life where it’s hard to love, and it’s hard to love big. Certain situations and relationships with exes or family members, even co-workers, it takes a lot to open our hearts and to love at a bigger and higher level.

Anybody ever have a difficult person or a challenging relationship where it was just hard to love, let alone love bigger? And I bet every one of us has some relationship in our lives right now that’s calling us to love bigger and to be more understanding. To be more generous; to be more supportive and encouraging.

I absolutely bet that Mary felt loved by Joseph and Jesus felt loved by Joseph. And Jesus felt loved by Joseph because he was just willing to love big and be a great support in their lives. It’s a huge thing! I think the Joseph role was to love bigger and I think life is calling us to open our hearts and to love bigger at this Christmas time.

You know, Christmas is about the great birth. And a part of that birth is the role and the example that Mary and Joseph had. It wasn’t just about going from Nazareth to Bethlehem; it was the qualities they expressed, especially their willingness. It was their willingness that got this virgin and older carpenter to literally become the parents and to facilitate the birth of the Christ child. And my question for you is: Are you willing to listen to the voice of God guiding you? Are you willing to believe that all things are possible? And this is for your highest purpose? Are you willing to pause and connect and use your feeling nature to know and feel if this is right for you? Are you willing to let go of your ego and do what is for the best? And are you willing to love big and to support big?

Because if we want to have the most enriching and wonderful Christmas, the things we need to do is to learn from these two great example and lessons of Mary and Joseph.

God bless you all! [Congregation applauds]

Copyright 2022 Unity of Phoenix Spiritual Center/Rev. Richard Maraj